"Many of us, at one point or another in our lives, take a moment to reflect and evaluate our lives and the paths that we have chosen to take. We may do it at different times and with different emphasis. Sometimes people do it around high school or college graduation time, when deciding what career to pursue, how we want to be regarded by society, friends, and family or how to transition ourselves from a student to a adults.
Some people do the evaluative process when planning for a family. Sometimes it takes the illness or death of a family member, or some other tragic event to make us stop and see if we are taking our life in the right direction.
For many of us, however, hitting a certain age can cause one to stop and take pause. This is happening to me. I had just hit the big 4-0. I have been saying and believing that today’s 40 is yesterday’s 30, but I am shocked at this age - what I had always considered to be middle aged. It’s hitting me harder than I had anticipated.
Part of the problem for me with aging is that I never “feel� my age. I have this preconceived notion about what a person should be feeling or doing at a given age. I am always surprised though that I never match up with what my notion is. I have also realized that no one ever wants to be their real age.
I want to go to the park and run around with my girls, I want to jump in the lake during the summers and sled down a hill in the winters, I want to hike in the Rockies and snuggle by the fire, I want to like myself and the life that I live because I am choosing to do so.
I don’t want someone to tell me that I need to act my age, I want them to be envious that I don’t. I am choosing to believe that I am worthy of friendships, love, happiness, and any compliment that someone chooses to offer. I am trying to embracing the fact that I am 40, and I am going to feel great about starting a new page in my book of life.
I am choosing to go after what I want and if I don’t get it, I will choose not to let it devastate me. When that happens, I’ll pick up my behind and go after something else. I want to feel alive and proud and energized by my family, friends, and my own desire not to be stagnant."
