A few years ago threre were a few friends of mine who had been married in the twenties, that found themselves divorcing in their thirties.

Some of them went through some pretty difficult times immediately following that period, but having gone through all of that, some of them came out with a better sense of who they were and what they wanted out of life.

Today, I can point to friends who are happily married with kids in their second marriages. Does anyone here have that kind of positive experience the second time around?

Thak does!! His first wife was a terrible mistake. His second wife is awesome.

He's worth it.

I was just talking about this with my girlfriend this morning. I am having a hard time letting go of a recent relationship and she shot off all of these examples of people who tried again and failed. So I shot of several examples of people who suceeded including my Mommy and her third husband. They dated for about a year and broke up. After about two years they reunited and married. They were happily married for almost 27 years until her untimly death last year. They had one of the most loving relationships I know of.

My aunt and uncle are another example. They have been together for well over 30 years...off and on. They had 5 children together and each time my aunt was pregnant my uncle cheated on her. Within the last ten years they devorced and remarried and now they are extreamly happy. These situations can be mended if those involved give in to their capacity to love and forgive.

I think it is hard for men to grow up. Sometimes it takes loosing what they love to make those changes in their life to be ready for a real lasting relationship. In the case of my Mother, she was the one who was not ready. She had recently devorced my father and was not over him and needed more time before she was ready to trust and love again.

Best of luck to you!

"We must BE the change we wish to see in the world"-Gandhi

I think most women are grown up by the time they have their first period....

Men take much much longer these day...but sometimes I think that is more solid kind of grown up.....then again...I'm a man.

We as humans grow up as we live lives together with our partners...it takes years before something really builds around a fragile place where two people share a life. Patience and trust....hard to come by.

I guess since I've not had any relationships that lasted longer than a decade....I've had a re-hook up after not seeing someone for ten years...but that was no different...we started where we left off. And the result was lack of effort on both parties just like how we left it.

I'll be able to leave something more useful on a post, after a dozen years with somebody....can you guys wait?

..

My best friend had her first period at the age of nine. I had mine at the age of fifteen. I wasn`t a grown-up woman at fifteen, neither was my friend at nine. Maybe physically but not mentally.

I might have used the wrong term....Some what aware of life? instead of the term, grown up?

Boys don't even have that till 20 if that.

i think if anything society forces women to grow up much faster, and i think this is engineered predominantly for reasons based on physical beauty and child-rearing.