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AznLover 28 and overDiscussions by members aged 28 and over.
What is the most popular site on the Internet? Google, a search engine. It is the nature of the Internet that we are searching for something. An answer. A sense of belonging. A desire to be noticed. Maybe love. Maybe friendship. Easing our loneliness. Looking for an answer to a question you don't even know yet. Entertainment.
On this site, I see a lot of fights because I think peope are all searching for different things. Just look at the way the site is laid out. Photos of men and women who are couples. It sparks longing because you want to be that couple too. Good looking Asian men. It makes us want to me like those good looking asian men too. The women want to have an Asian man like them.
So you have people who are missing something. They want what they don't have. Then you have people who just want fun. They're bored and want a diversion. Conflicting interests. Conflicting searches.
It's like the things that are never said in the day time in polite company all coming out like babbles. A psychic could go mad listening to all the babbles of the voices inside people's head. So this site is the psychic. You hear everything.
What are you searching for?
I am searching for some meaning I think. Some sense that things are changing, innovating, erotica for Asian men.
I also search for love in real life. I have not found it. I don't expect to find it here. But where else can I write honesty and have people hear and listen and comment. It's here. So I share my thoughts.
This is also interesting. Are we going too much into virtual communities instead of real communities? Or are we too impatient now, wanting quick friendships, getting rid of friendships like an old shirt, getting a new one, then leaving it again for another one. Is there something wrong with America? Are Asians Americans more socially isolated than white Americans?
"WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Americans are more socially isolated than they were 20 years ago, separated by work, commuting and the single life, researchers reported on Friday.
Nearly a quarter of people surveyed said they had "zero" close friends with whom to discuss personal matters. More than 50 percent named two or fewer confidants, most often immediate family members, the researchers said.
"This is a big social change, and it indicates something that's not good for our society," said Duke University Professor Lynn Smith-Lovin, lead author on the study to be published in the American Sociological Review."
Very insightful post. I agree, it is part of the human condition to be searching. I wrote a blog on this a few months back (in my myspace one, not here) which is titled "does anyone ever get 'there?'" In that entry, I was mostly meaning in academic and professional regards, but really, it is in all fascets of our lives I think.
As for what I am searching for here, in a word, friendship, and I've found that with many of the good people here. I live in a place where there aren't too many people for me to hang out with (although my luck has really changed for the better lately, and I have a few local friends now.) This site has afforded me the opportunity to become friends with intelligent, open-minded, and wonderful people. My friends here are the ones who got me through Thak's last deployment, and I hope they know that if it had not been for them keeping me company via the chatroom, yahoo, and all their kind and encouraging PM's, emails, and phone calls, I'd surely have lost my mind.
As for what I'm searching for in general, well, that's a bit more obscure. I study physics, and I dream about a winning Nobel Prize one day for making a discovery which revolutionizes the way people know the world. I dream about my name being in every physics textbook in the world for hundreds of years after my death. I dream of having a therom, a law, or a principle with my name on it so that everyone who takes physics will know (and probably mispronounce! LOL) my impossible Scandinavian last name which has about twice as many vowels as it should. I guess you could say I'm ultimately in search of immortality. Truely great scientists live forever in through their discoveries. I want to be one of the great ones. I am searching for my home within my discipline which will allow me to become great.
I am searching for the professor who will guide me. I am searching for the one who inspires me with his presence. I think I may have found him. I sit in the front row when he lectures, and he makes me smile with the way he does calculations. He knows my name. He is kind to me in the lab when I make mistakes, and is firm yet forgiving. He knows I want to do well, and when I get frustrated, he reassures me, but cuts me no slack. He is soft-spoken, but deliberate. He is young, but confident in his abilities as a physicist. I like being his student. When I am a professor one day, I want to be like him. I am searching for the confidence to get there.
I am searching for balance. I have so many things on my plate, and it seems like something always gets put on the back burner. Between the kiddo, the husband, the studies, and everything else, there is never enough time. I am searching for the balance to be a great physicist as well as an outstanding wife and mother.
I am constantly searching... it is the human condition to strive for better.
Nice posts both of you I started a thread before asking people what they are you waiting for, becuase we all seem to be waiting for something, but we search as well, you are correct.
On Google I search for the lyrics to songs that have touched my heart. On this site and in general I search for people who will do the same. Those who can understand me. I search for friendship, companionship, people to spend my life with in one form or another on an equal level. Balance. People that "get" me, the ones I can talk to and they know what I'm saying and make me feel less obscure than I normally do. The ones that I don't have to explain my every word and action to. I search for love as well, but not actively, nor do I expect to find it on the internet, LOL I search for entertainment and a place where my voice is heard, and if not always agreed with at least it's not shut out and ignored. What I search for I've found here
This is also interesting. Are we going too much into virtual communities instead of real communities? Or are we too impatient now, wanting quick friendships, getting rid of friendships like an old shirt, getting a new one, then leaving it again for another one. Is there something wrong with America? Are Asians Americans more socially isolated than white Americans?
This is interesting. I believe the modern life style, the pursuit of material success before family and friendship, and the increased mobility all contribute to urban alienation - the feeling of loneliness when you're surrounded by millions of people. So people turn to the virtual world for support. Human beings are social animals after all.
I think signs of people withdrawing from daily non-virtual social interaction with others are everywhere. People walking down the street in the own little worlds with headphones or earpieces on. People resorting to posting on craigslist missed connections rather than approaching that person when they had the chance. I think it's just a gradual retardation of people's social skills. Maybe this is part of our evolution to obtain new methods of communicating. Maybe in another thousand years we will no longer be able to read other people's body language but we will respond to things like LMAO, IMO or something like
I do think people are losing their social skills. Their ability to relate. Their ability to emphathize. They emphathize with characters on the television screen more than with the man walking next to them on the sidewalk. They see the world through their own selfish eyes, watching only the channels that agrees with their values. Other channels are just static to them, just like other people are just static to them.
And then because Americans feel this loneliness, feel this frustration, feel this lack of a human touch and recognition, they then go to virtual sites. They act out on these sites. I see people acting out here and I know that they do it because of what they lack in real life. It is sad. I think we are in a downward dive and will not recover.
I guess I'm searching for a bigger role beyond the "work, earn money, go home, get up, work" type of existence, but I still don't really know where to start. I have this naive, romantic longing to transcend, to be humbled, to see humanity through a god's eyes but also to see the universe with my own eyes.
Secretly I look up the starry skies and wonder if people feel the same way as I do - that we are all meant to be so much more, and our potential is vast, but we're too blind to see it.
As for the internet, well, its bound to attract all sorts of people one can only hope they find some kind balance in life.
Recent developments in my personal life have caused certain minor changes in what I am searching for. (It is why I have not been posting here or even visiting with any semblance of the frequency with which I once did)
In general, I do not believe I am actively/consciously searching for anything.
I tend to come upon things that pique my interest at that moment in time and if the circumstances are just right; I follow up on that and delve deeper to see if there is something there to hold my interest. This is usually where my hobbies come from. I have very few of these.
Conceptually speaking, if I were to actually take it upon myself to actively search for something ...
I believe I would be searching for Truth. This means different things to different people. I saw this movie a few weeks ago about how we as individuals and as a group consciousness, tend to view Reality. Does it shape our perception or does our perception shape it?
You may have noticed glimpses of this in your life.
Some have mentioned studies done with containers of water or rice where two identical test items are subjected to polar opposites (i.e. negative emotions vs. positive emotions) and what the results of continued exposure were and what the implications of these results have on our own perception of Reality.
It's interesting. It is one manifestation of the search for Truth.
What is Real?
When I make the time, I search for personal Enlightenment. I try to stop and try very hard to distance myself from the mundane, everyday "stuff" that tends to rule/dominate my life and through my lack of action, ultimately dull or disengage me mentally, emotionally, spiritually, sensually from the things that occur all around me ... but that I am too distracted to notice.
It's an ongoing struggle. It requires effort.
I want to write more, but I have to pee.
Scientia non est potentia,
quae prologum potentia solidum est.
"Roses and Vanilla still smell better than the inside of somebody's ass ..." ~ JML circa 2006
I started a thread before asking people what they are you waiting for, becuase we all seem to be waiting for something, but we search as well, you are correct. 
one can only hope they find some kind balance in life.
