Set me straight
Posted 08-29-2008 at 08:38 PM by paloma
So I'm living with my in-laws this semester for various reasons. And they have a pretty crappy marriage. My MIL is a control freak and my FIL has no backbone. There was a really cool lightning storm last night and the family was up watching it. The two kids and I were in one part of their ginormous McMansion, and the parents were a few rooms away. I could hear her sniping at him "Don't stand in the doorway like that! Oh come on that's stupid. Get over here right now! You are making the dog nervous!" I couldn't hear his response, but I'm guessing he joined her on the sofa. She cuts him down, and he doesn't stand up for himself, and he has told me several times that he drinks to deal with her. I'm not approving of his alcoholism, I'm just sayin'. At times I think she gets off on the drama in her household.
So that's them. Tonight his AA sponsor and his sponsor's fiancee, also a recovering alcoholic, are having dinner with my in-laws. Oh yeah on the weekends the baby and I live with my parents while I work. So today before I left for the weekend, my MIL was cooking the dinner. This is her menu to serve three recovering alcoholics.
Veal in Marsala OK, I am morally opposed to veal, but that's not the issue. The Marsala wine is the problem.
Eggplant Parmigiana Fine.
other Italian stuff
Tiramisu Yeah, as in ladyfingers soaked in rum.
So this is where I'm wondering if I need to be set straight. Is she fucking nuts to serve a boozy dinner like that, or am I being too judgemental? The alcohol in the Marsala will mostly cook out, but the taste will still be there, and I'm guessing these people do not want the taste in their food. She also baked bread with beer in it the other day, and she made a big deal out of her husband not being allowed to have any, which is fucking retarded, while the two tween-age kids and I could. I think she does things to sabotage her husband's recovery because she prefers the drama.
What say you?
So that's them. Tonight his AA sponsor and his sponsor's fiancee, also a recovering alcoholic, are having dinner with my in-laws. Oh yeah on the weekends the baby and I live with my parents while I work. So today before I left for the weekend, my MIL was cooking the dinner. This is her menu to serve three recovering alcoholics.
Veal in Marsala OK, I am morally opposed to veal, but that's not the issue. The Marsala wine is the problem.
Eggplant Parmigiana Fine.
other Italian stuff
Tiramisu Yeah, as in ladyfingers soaked in rum.
So this is where I'm wondering if I need to be set straight. Is she fucking nuts to serve a boozy dinner like that, or am I being too judgemental? The alcohol in the Marsala will mostly cook out, but the taste will still be there, and I'm guessing these people do not want the taste in their food. She also baked bread with beer in it the other day, and she made a big deal out of her husband not being allowed to have any, which is fucking retarded, while the two tween-age kids and I could. I think she does things to sabotage her husband's recovery because she prefers the drama.
What say you?
Total Comments 7
Comments
-
wow. i want to have dinner at her house. lol
you are not being judgmental. the taste is enough for some alcoholics and if they are fucken going to aa meetings...there is NO need to any of it in foods, either. the lady fingers soaked in rum is out of line.
she does sound like she gets off greatly from the power play she has in that home. now i am understanding things a little better. i would hope that he was a maniac in bed in the past to make up for all the dick slapping she is giving him.Posted 08-29-2008 at 08:53 PM by xqzmi
-
That's a really ballsy thing to do - serve an alcohol enhanced gourment meal to recovering alcoholics...yikes. Sounds a little passive aggressive to me. I'd set her straight.
I'm sure these people have worked really hard at overcoming their addictions and by serving it to them it's a slap in the face. Just my thoughts.Posted 08-29-2008 at 08:58 PM by Leannada
-
Nah. That's OK. A little alcohol don't hurt.Posted 08-29-2008 at 11:11 PM by BNZ
-
oh my god, hugs!!!!!!Posted 08-30-2008 at 02:17 AM by xqzmi
-
I think you are right. If she does it consciously or subconsciously, it is counterproductive.Quote:I think she does things to sabotage her husband's recovery because she prefers the drama.
What say you?
One can cook so many delicious meals without alc, if I knew a guest of mine recovered from alcoholism I would never dish out something like this. The effect on recovering alcoholics differs, some would have trouble with it, some not, but it's a matter of respect to me.
If someone decides to lay off the booze, which is a good decision to me, I wouldn't expose him to it.
I held meetings without drinking or serving alc myself because I didn't want to tempt a recovering alc (or make him feel left out) who was there too. Not that hard to do, really.
How can you stand living there?Posted 08-30-2008 at 06:25 AM by Lady_Fate
-
When a man in the relationship has no backbone, it completes offsets the very nature of a man-woman relationship. And sometimes unconsciously, the woman starts doing things which gives the man no choice but to man the fuck up (Which is what she wants). However, when he fails to do so, her disappointment will eventually lead to resenment because what a woman truly want and need is a strong and able man she can trust. Her resenment will lead to giving him more shit, which leads to him becoming a bigger pussy, which leads her to give him more shit - it's a vicious cycle. I'd say at this point, there is really no hope. She's going to push his buttons until he dies.Posted 08-30-2008 at 07:29 AM by Beerbuttchicken
-
she might push him too far and get an axe in the forehead while she's sleeping.
Posted 08-30-2008 at 02:39 PM by Shang Chi
