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All the ugly people
Posted 10-23-2009 at 08:44 AM by swoltz
I was looking at the poll and how many people think of others and themselves worst of all as ugly.
Wow....
One thing I have noticed about myself, is that 'ugly' is a foreign concept to me when it comes to looks.
If I think someone is ugly, something within them that disgusts me is shining through, even if the majority of people see that person as gorgeous.
It is unbelievable but I look at people from the inside out. I do not know how I do it.
Not to say I don't find people unattractive. I find people who could be models unattractive the same as I find people who would not even be allowed onto a runway attractive.
I don't think of myself as ugly. I used to and I do get relapses of 'what the hell is up with my face?'
but how could I truly think I am ugly? I have to live with myself and it'd be a cruddy life to walk around with that attitude.
I know this does not hold true for everyone, I am speaking for myself. I tend to see beauty in places others don't and ugliness in places people don't bother to look.
Being attracted to someone doesn't make them beautiful and vice versa.
My scientific, medical geeky side comes out when I see people who have serious things wrong with the way they look. Good example, at my hospital job there was a cleaning lady who was quite over weight, limped, stringy matted hair, very stained teeth that were very crooked and she was a bit cross eyed.
She smiled at me and told me I looked nice. I smiled back, not thinking she was ugly but breaking down what medical conditions she may have based on her abnormalities.
I am more intrigued by people than anything else. I feel like an outsider looking in, not a part of the whole; an observer. That may explain a lot about me.
Wow....
One thing I have noticed about myself, is that 'ugly' is a foreign concept to me when it comes to looks.
If I think someone is ugly, something within them that disgusts me is shining through, even if the majority of people see that person as gorgeous.
It is unbelievable but I look at people from the inside out. I do not know how I do it.
Not to say I don't find people unattractive. I find people who could be models unattractive the same as I find people who would not even be allowed onto a runway attractive.
I don't think of myself as ugly. I used to and I do get relapses of 'what the hell is up with my face?'
but how could I truly think I am ugly? I have to live with myself and it'd be a cruddy life to walk around with that attitude.
I know this does not hold true for everyone, I am speaking for myself. I tend to see beauty in places others don't and ugliness in places people don't bother to look.
Being attracted to someone doesn't make them beautiful and vice versa.
My scientific, medical geeky side comes out when I see people who have serious things wrong with the way they look. Good example, at my hospital job there was a cleaning lady who was quite over weight, limped, stringy matted hair, very stained teeth that were very crooked and she was a bit cross eyed.
She smiled at me and told me I looked nice. I smiled back, not thinking she was ugly but breaking down what medical conditions she may have based on her abnormalities.
I am more intrigued by people than anything else. I feel like an outsider looking in, not a part of the whole; an observer. That may explain a lot about me.
Total Comments 8
Comments
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I guess I'm just more superficial than that. There are certain things I just don't find remotely attractive, and they stick out so obviously to me when I look at a room full of people. (Of course, the things I do find very attractive also are very noticeable to me, so it's not like I JUST go around going, "OMG I see ugly people!!" Not at all.) I see what you're saying about unattractive vs ugly, but I've never been one to pay much attention to semantics on this thing. To me, unattractive and ugly are the same thing. I seldom differentiate, but I understand why a lot of people do. Features interest me. If I could draw, or paint, or sculpt, I would probably be an artist, because I know beauty when I see it, and there are some beautiful people in this world. However, there are also some really really really ugly (or unattractive, or not visually pleasing) ones as well, in my personal opinion.Posted 10-23-2009 at 08:58 AM by Nomad
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I look at people the same way, swoltz. Kudos to you for seeing it at such a young age. Although I do remember having the revelation when I was about 16 that it's the inside that truly makes a difference in who is attractive and who is not. I met a guy who had severe acne scars and of course I thought he was unattractive. He did have gorgeous eyes and a nice smile, but I would not have given him the time of day. As it happened, I got to know him, like him and the ugliness of his scars faded away.
In the last ten years, I begun to see the extraordinary beauty in old folks. The more wrinkled and toothless the better. I do as you did with the cleaning lady. I imagine their life's struggles and how they came to be, and what a physical beauty they might have been back in their day. But the beauty I see in them comes from their inner strength, their wisdom and the sheer fact that they have lived for so long and are still smiling. Most of all, I think, is something I've realized as I have gotten older is they don't see themselves as a senior citizen; they don't think of themselves as an old person or only as a grandparent or great-grandparent. So, I talk to "people of a certain age" a little differently now. I engage them as I would a contemporary.Posted 10-23-2009 at 09:16 AM by msohaiku 
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I'm not ugly, I'm handsomely challenged.Posted 10-23-2009 at 10:33 AM by Intolight
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Yeah I think there is an element of that mindset linked to maturation. But I think there are things that can precipitate it.( and some ppl will just never think like that) I can very clearly remember at school meeting some people who I thought were very pretty/attractive but then they just had the nasiest negative attitude and seem to revel in putting people down like it was a hobby or something. Well I found very quickly indeed that these ppl now appeared very ugly to me, But it wasnt like it was just mental they physically appeared unattractive. And the quieter kind girl stood out as the prettiest. That lesson pretty much stuck with me ever since. I think thats one of the reasons why alot of women are less inclined to oogled over pictures of men because if you dont what the guy is like as a person its hard to know if he is attractive.
And it made me lol when you were talking about 'diagnosing' that woman - my other half does that alll time (I love it when the geek in him comes out heh) I tell you i have learnt some obscure stuff that way ! lol
Posted 10-23-2009 at 10:58 AM by minerva
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you have such a great mind, I am so disappointed I underestimated how far you were last week! I would have loved hanging out with you. All I can add is that had I been superficial at the time in my life where I immediately assumed asian= ugly, I would never have had the greatest love of my life. Packaging matters less and less to me.Posted 10-23-2009 at 11:15 AM by mimi
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If asked to write out a list of 5 things I like about the way I look, I would hand you back an empty piece of paper. Just can't do it.
When I walk into a room full of people, I don't pick out "Oh, he/she is ugly!". I tend to think "Damn, everyone here is so much better looking than me, even that chubby limping girl with the cross eyes".
I am quick to point out other people's beauty, but I'm lost when it comes to finding my own.Posted 10-23-2009 at 12:30 PM by saramegan
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You know what.. I don't notice ugly until someone opens their mouth. I'll be completely honest.. when someone does/says something mean or hateful I'll be more than happy to point out how their face reminds me of a donkey..Posted 10-23-2009 at 02:03 PM by Forcefeed
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^^ or a horse.Posted 10-23-2009 at 05:06 PM by mimi
