DavidDH

Gender:

This is not a long scenario. But I wanted to see what this site's members thought.

If you found out that your significant other cheated on you with your best friend of the same gender, who would you have a tougher time forgiving? For that matter, would there be any forgiveness to either?

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"Now they have 'The Last Samurai' with Tom Cruise. I'm going to produce my own damn movie. I'll call it 'The Last N*gger on Earth' starring Tom Hanks." -- Paul Mooney

saramegan

Gender:

None for either of them. They obviously didn't give a shit about you, so why give them a 2nd chance? The only thing worse than SO/BFF cheating is SO/sibling cheating.

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AndyMillman

Gender:

This isn't an either/or type of question for me. They would both me out of my life forever and there would be no forgiveness.

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FortuneNooky

Gender:

Been there done that. You tell them both to fuck off and move on with your life.

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"Success is going from failure to failure without the loss of enthusiam"-- Anonymous

mimi

Gender:

They are removed from my life, but forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. Harboring bitterness just rots yourself. Doesn't mean you are naive and set yourself up as a doormat though.

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"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." (Edmund Burke)

Luckzta

Gender:

You forgive both. Give each a pat on the cheek. Keep them close. But on the day the Corleone family settles its business, they do not survive.

Arya

Gender:

Forgive neither. On the offchance that the end up happy together, poison one.

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Little did he know, her satisfied smirk at the end of dinner resulted not from the joy of pleasing her husband, but the satisfaction of knowing the secret ingredient was bleach.

CityLights

Gender:

I like this solution. It's very Shakespearean.

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swoltz

Gender:

I would be deeply hurt and cease contact with both people. I would be angry for a long time and remain just a tiny bit bitter but I would make sure I don't blame what happened on myself or condemn those people.

I would for give them eventually, as much as I could. People, ourselves included, are going to do messed up things, it's just a part of life we must all accept. When we do, it's easier to forgive.

Seiferia

Gender:

Well, it seems that unforgiveness seems to be the opinion/action of choice for most, so far.

As much as one should never be a doormat to be walked over and trampled to dust, one must also consider at least bearing a minuscule amount of sympathy/empathy for others. Betrayal of any sort, would often cause us to compromise the better part of ourselves, turning our sense of Justice to a desire for Vengeance.

Personally, this has happened to me before, and I was flabbergasted and thrown into a downward spiral of despair.

I don't want to be long winded though. To cut a very long story short, I ended up (surprisingly) happy that my ex-girlfriend found true love.

I find it personally that it is easier on one's self and conscience to live, knowing you have made someone's life joyful and filled with meaning. Living one's (romantic?) life to the fullest also includes, to a situational extent, about cutting away at the "negative emotions which can be cancers to the soul" and "anathemas that would be prolonged by unforgiveness" that would send you falling into a personal hell.

P.S: I still have a very hard time dealing with forgiveness. I am no better than anyone, and I am definitely flawed in many ways. So please don't form the impression that I am a righteous crusader, just someone that has been-there-done-that, OK ?